SJA: From Raxacoricofallapatorius with Love

Aww, Ronnie Corbett. Of all the victims of the great celebrity cull of 2016, he was one of my favourites. His presence on my screen is guaranteed to make me smile – it’s the warm feeling you get when an old family friend pops round. This was clearly written with a great deal of affection for the man, and it’s exactly my kind of in-jokey humour. Although, by my count he’s the third Rani.

Like any good Comic Relief sketch (and lord knows *good* Comic Relief sketches have been few and far between in recent years), it gets very silly very quickly, and then more so. Of course the gang are all wearing deadly deely boppers. Of course Ronnie Corbett is a Slitheen. Of course K-9 turns up and gets clamped. And that final shot of K-9 improbably sporting a Red Nose for no logical reason is superb. Five minutes of pure joy.

RATING: 9

SJA: Enemy of the Bane

The extraordinary thing about this show is how it’s forever expanding its own little world, while also maintaining such strong links to the past. The SJA-specific mythology continues to grow apace, with Mrs Wormwood and the Bane becoming the latest recurring enemies. Her asking for help and vowing that she’d turned good is not dissimilar to the current Missy storyline in the main show, with the added element of giving poor old Luke some mummy issues to deal with.

And this was all fine and dandy, but let’s face it, what I’m really interested in is the other big guest star. It was such a warm, comforting feeling to see Sir Brigadier one last time. Nicholas Courtney may have been moving a little slower than he was in the old days, but he’s still just as sharp, smooth and charming as ever. Imagine being told when the show came back in 2005 that within four years, we’d be seeing Sarah Jane and the Brigadier breaking into UNIT and stealing alien artifacts. Such a joy.

I wasn’t aware that this story was the origin of UNIT’s Black Archive, which seems to have been moved between this story and the 50th, because that warehouse looked nothing like the Tower of London. I share the Brig’s slight distaste for the RTD-era portrayal of UNIT, and it brought home just how much they’ve softened since the likes of Kate and Osgood took over. Oddly, the Major we meet is very much modeled after the old-school 70s UNIT – he’s like an even creepier Mike Yates.

It was no real surprise that he turned out to be a Bane, and it wasn’t the type of the story where there’s much complexity to the plot – every trap is obvious, every double-cross predictable, every story beat linear and logical – but, a) it’s a kid’s show, and b) it’s really well executed and loads of fun. It sets out to do a straight-forward job, but it does it with a great deal of success.

That said, it did provide me with one all too rare moment of genuine surprise – a plot twist that I didn’t already know about in advance from a next time trailer or a DVD cover. The Sontarans are back as well! Specifically, it’s Kaagh from earlier in the series, who was always likely to show up again having been allowed to leave Earth, but I wasn’t expecting it so soon. He’s not quite as strong as he was in his first appearance, as he’s playing second fiddle to Wormwood a lot of the time, and so unable to assert his dominance.

But even if this story – and indeed this entire series – did nothing else, it gave us Sarah Jane and The Brigadier being reunited and facing off against Sontarans, on actual telly in the 21st century. Quite extraordinary.

RATING: 8

SERIES AVERAGE RATING: 7.67

  • SJA series watched: 2 of 5
  • SJA stories watched: 12 of 27
  • Individual SJA episodes watched: 23 of 53

I’ll be back to Bannerman Road before I know it, but first, it’ll be Christmas again…

SJA: The Temptation of Sarah Jane Smith

I don’t understand it. There I am, happily watching a nice lightweight fantasy show aimed at 9-13 year olds, and then next thing I know there are tears streaming down my face. This was an extraordinary episode, easily matching, and indeed bettering, a great number of stories from regular Who.

The Trickster is a cracking invention, and he works so well as a recurring character because he’s essentially a What-If Machine. Whenever he turns up, you know you’re in for something weird and alternative-timeline-y, but it’s a different scenario every time; after tackling “what if Sarah Jane died as a child?” and “what if Donna never met The Doctor”, it’s now “what if Father’s Day happened to Sarah Jane?”.

It’s all there, right down to the heroic sacrifice via a car accident. It was obvious throughout that it was heading to the familiar conclusion, but that didn’t matter, because what happens when Father’s Day happens to Sarah Jane is that you get Elisabeth Sladen being incredible. While it’s entirely possible that my response is more emotional than it might have been were she still with us, it takes nothing away from the strength of her captivating performance.

Sarah Jane acts recklessly and selfishly, with all the arrogance and hubris of The Doctor at the worst of his excesses. And yet we’re always on her side, because the entire first episode is given over to establishing her reasons – she does the wrong thing, but you can completely understand why. It’s a universal theme; in one way or another, everyone’s either lost parents, is scared of losing parents, or has to deal with not having parents to lose.

Raw emotion is always bubbling under the surface, but there are plenty of fun moments to be had while exploring the past with Sarah Jane’s parents, such as Luke’s impeccable ability to count gobstoppers, or their distinctly 00s choice of pseudonyms. There was even a reference to “miners on Peladon”, which is admittedly not the most surprising Peladon reference I’ve seen this week.

It all led up to stonking cliffhanger, with a cheap but effective rendition of a destroyed Earth, bolstered by the Planet of the Apes inspired inclusion of a befucked Big Ben. And as a resident of Ealing for ten years next month, I appreciated the Greenford tube sign, even if the font wasn’t anywhere near correct. Thinking about it, that must have been Ace’s local station too; I wonder if she ever found herself on Bannerman Road at any point?

Oh, and I loved the mix-up with the police box, which even went as far as playing the appropriate bit of music from the main show. Funny, tragic, creepy, heartwarming; this story is very special indeed. And who was that I glimpsed in the next time trailer? I’m going to cry again, aren’t I?

RATING: 9

SJA: The Mark of the Berserker

We’re definitely into uncharted territory now – I had no idea there was such a thing as a Sarah Jane-lite episode. Presumably it means that the next serial will be kids-lite, and if so then this one has definitely got the raw end of the deal. It’s all well and good, but maybe I’d rather see Sarah Jane chasing a three-eyed alien slug around a hospital?

I jest; while it does feel like there’s a little of the magic missing in her absence, the kids are up to the job of holding things together, and it’s a very interesting proposition. There’s no alien villain as such, just an alien artifact for people to misuse, which is usually Torchwood territory. Unsurprisingly, SJA does it better; while it’s a bit annoying that they’ve reached for mind control for the fourth story in a row, they at least use it to tell a very human story.

The story being mostly that Clyde’s dad is a twat. The bullied kid at school uses the power to get revenge. Rani rejects the power as soon as it makes itself known. He uses it to steal, cheat and brainwash his own son. All the stuff about why he walked out and the effect it had on Clyde was brilliantly handled, and must have really resonated with many of the young audience, but all I could think about was how horrible this man was. Stealing his son’s most precious memories, the essence of who he is, so that he could snatch him away. And he made Rani’s dad do press-ups for, like, ages. The man’s a monster.

Mind you, Clyde did his fair share of ridiculous things too, not least taking his dad to the attic in the fist place, just to show off. This is unbelievably stupid, as is Clyde’s dad for casually mentioning Daleks like they’re an everyday thing, and yet still being skeptical about the existence of aliens. And then at the end, don’t throw the pendant into the sea, silly bollocks. Either it’ll wash up somewhere for someone else to quite literally go Full Circle, or a fish will use it to take over the world. Is that what you want? Cause that’s what’s gonna happen.

I did really like this episode, I promise, it’s just that the silly bits are more fun to write about. I’ll finish with one more thing I enjoyed – Maria turning up unexpectedly over Skype. Much like The Doctor’s various long distance companions, I like the idea of a wider network of people in the field. Maria and her l33t hacker dad essentially filled in the function of Mr Smith, who was also given a week off – maybe there’s a Mr Smith single-hander later in the series.

RATING: 7

SJA: Secrets of the Stars

I think it was around this point that I stopped watching The Sarah Jane Adventures on a regular basis. Not because I wasn’t enjoying it or anything like that, it was just that I fell behind and never bothered to catch up. From this point on, I’d just tune in whenever The Doctor showed up, so other those couple of episodes, it’s all going to be new to me from now on, which is exciting.

I can’t be sure exactly when it was that I stopped watching, but having remembered the Sontaran and Bradley Walsh, I’m pretty sure I’d have remembered Russ Abbot. The show seems to have adopted a policy of getting mid-range light entertainment figures to play the villains, and I’m all in favour. As with Bradley last time, it was a performance that dominated the episode, and was a lot of fun – you could tell Russ was having a whale of time chewing the scenery.

It was a somewhat similar plot to the last story, with entertainers going evil and trying to steal people away. All three stories so far this series have involved mind control too, so I hope it starts being more varied soon. This time, the bad guy was an astrologist, although his show was more like that of a medium or stage hypnotist, so they covered all the shyster bases. It struck me that when he mentioned The Doctor and triggered a flashback, it should have been Pertwee or Tom that Sarah Jane saw, but admittedly this might have gone over the kiddies’ heads.

The slight problem with using astrology as the bad guy’s weapon is that it means you have to treat astrology as a real thing, when it very much isn’t. The way it was used, with star signs allowing Russ Abbot to control a twelfth of the population at a time, was similar to the blood control in The Christmas Invasion, but I found it easier to buy into that because I don’t dispute that blood exists.

But as always, the real story is how it affects the gang, and I spent a good portion of the episode thinking that Luke was being a bit of a tit by sulking so much over his lack of birthday. Then I realised that Luke’s struggles are the show acknowledging how it feels for kids when they’re “different”, whether that’s because of race, sexuality, gender issues, disabilities, autism (a big parallel in Luke’s case), or being created in a lab by a soft drinks manufacturer. In the end, it’s Luke being different that saves the world, and the show is doing admirable work for its young audience.

Also, I enjoyed Trinity Wells being taken over by Russ Abbot too. About time she got involved in the action.

RATING: 7

SJA: The Day of the Clown

Alright, whose stupid idea was it to give a new lead character in a Doctor Who spin-off the same name as a recurring villain from the 1980s? Unless, of course, she’s really The Rani’s latest regeneration working undercover, and they’re building up to the ultimate shock twist. Either way, I’ve already warmed to her much more quickly than I did with Maria – she’s more ballsy and strong-minded, and without wanting to be cruel to an actual child, the average standard of acting has been raised. Her dad being the new headmaster is a nice extra detail, plus her mum is Constable Habib.

She was initially set up to be a nightmare neighbour for each of the incumbent regulars – she’s far too inquisitive for Sarah Jane’s liking, Clyde’s not going to want to hang around with the headmaster’s daughter, and Luke’s just pissed off that she’s not Maria – which meant that the story’s function was to give her the opportunity to prove them wrong. She already feels like a natural addition to the team, so job done on that score.

Which is for the best, because the plot itself was a little thin. It was telling that they made a reference to Kudlak, as it is a very similar premise – new attraction opens in town, kids start to go missing, it’s an alien. This time, the alien is popular daytime quizmaster Bradley Walsh, or rather loveable Corrie rogue Bradley Walsh, as he was then. He does a much better job than I’d have expected, alternating between the classic creepy clown, Professor Emilius Browne from Bedknobs & Broomsticks, and the actual Pied Piper of Hamelin. It’s a memorably disturbing performance by any standards, let alone CBBC’s.

I also liked his mannequins coming to life, like Auton Clowns, but it’s a shame they were only in it for a couple of minutes. There were a few things that weren’t quite right, such as all the adults, in the middle of a spate of missing children, finding the concept of kiddie-snatchers dressed as clowns, handing out free balloons, so preposterous. I’m getting annoyed at how SJA seems to have diverged from the main show in terms of public awareness of aliens – it’s like the events of The Stolen Earth didn’t happen here, which might be easier to accept were it not for the fact that Sarah Jane, Luke and Mr Smith were part of those events.

The climax whereby humour is used to defeat fear was a good idea, but it fell slightly flat because Clyde’s delivery of the jokes was a bit shit. Nevertheless, there’s always plenty to enjoy in SJA, and I’m enjoying the increasingly obscure back-references. Pharos are back again, along with Floella Benjamin, and there’s also a mention of good old Aunt Lavinia from K-9 and Company. And, obviously, a photo from The Celestial Toymaker, a story that was wiped a good 20-odd years before the target audience was born.

And finally, that pocket-sized instant forcefield generator that Sarah Jane gives Rani is very useful, isn’t it? It’s surprising that they’ve never used it before, considering it could protect them from virtually any alien threat within seconds.

RATING: 7